---
section: Library
booktitle: "I Am Not As Thunk As You Drink I Am"
booktype: "Diaries"
bookcode: "THUNK"
dategiven: "24 October 1980 pm"
place: " in Chuang Tzu Auditorium"
chapternum: "Chapter #24"
chaptertitle: "None"
acode: "8010245"
shorttitle: "THUNK24"
audio: "No"
video: "No"
esttime: ""
displaytitle: "I Am Not As Thunk As You Drink I Am: Chapter #24"
---

```style
.sutra {
  font-style: italic;
  white-space: pre-wrap !important;
}
```
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> [!info]
> Note
>
[NOTE: This is an unedited tape transcript of an unpublished darshan diary, which has been scanned and cleaned up. It is for reference purposes only.]


(Emanuela means god is with us. If you truly feel this, then you know bliss, Osho tells us.)


The ordinary person remains in conflict with existence. That's what makes him ordinary. He is not in a state of attunement, he remains separate, surrounded by his own definition of his being. He remains enclosed, not open, not available. He is like a small island, and hence there is fear -- the ocean is vast and the danger is always there that the island may disappear any moment.


The initiation into sannyas means initiation into the wholeness of existence. It is the dropping of the ego and feeling one with the whole... because that's the truth:  we are not separate. Even if we want to be, we cannot be separate, we are intrinsically part of this organic unity of existence. We are not outsiders; this is our home.


The moment this feeling arises, one knows god is with us. Then all conflict and struggle disappears; a deep relaxation, a tremendous rest comes. That's the moment when bliss explodes.


(But we live in a world which has come to such a sorry state of affairs that the blissful people are banished, Osho points out in his next address to Ireneo.)


Society is capable of coping with mad people, with criminals, even with people like Adolf Hitler and Genghis Khan and Nadir Shah and Joseph Stalin and Mao Tse Tung. It is capable of coping with these people but it has not yet risen to the level where it can cope with a Jesus, a Socrates, a Mansoor. The gap is so big that the society feels threatened. The very existence of a blissful person humiliates millions of people, they feel insulted. His presence makes them aware of their stupidity, hence they cannot forgive him.


It is very difficult, it has never been possible up to now to forgive an enlightened person, to forgive a Buddha. Society takes as much revenge as possible, for the simple reason that he has gone astray. Society is living in misery and he has become blissful; society is living in darkness and he has become a light unto himself. He has gone astray, he has left the collective crowd, he has moved on a path of his own; he is no more part of the mob. The mob has been creating every possibility for him to be miserable and somehow he escaped, somehow he managed to get out of the prison.


Because of this one has to fight for bliss, otherwise bliss is very natural. Misery is unnatural, bliss is natural... just as flowers are natural. If a tree does not bloom that means something has gone wrong -- either the soil is not right or the climate, or the water is not enough or there is not enough sun -- something has gone wrong. If nothing has gone wrong then the tree is bound to blossom. Flowers are natural, bliss is a flowering. If nothing goes wrong every person will be blissful, but the society up to now has been against bliss.


By becoming a sannyasin you are taking a risk, you are going astray in the eyes of the crowd. From now onwards the only work that you have to do is to be blissful, in spite of all the obstacles that society will create. And to be blissful is to be religious, to be blissful is to be able to know god because god is nothing but the ultimate peak of bliss.


(On the eighteenth of the month he'd talked of the two births man needs to pass through. Tonight Osho talks about them in greater depth.)


The first birth is the coming out of the mother's womb, the second birth is the coming out of the mind's womb, coming out of the psychological structure, pattern, gestalt.


The child first lives as part of his mother's body, not separate at all. His mother's breath is his breath, his mother's nourishment is his nourishment, even his mother's mood affects him:  if she is happy he is happy, if she is miserable he is miserable. He is just a part of the body of the mother, they are joined, linked.


The second birth happens when you become unlinked with your mind. Otherwise people live in the mind, identified with the mind, thinking that they are nothing but the mind. Getting out of the mind, watching the mind, seeing it as separate, becoming more and more aware that you are not the mind, is the process of meditation.


The moment this becomes your absolute realization -- not just a thought but a realization, your experience -- the second birth has happened. Then one is well-born, only then is one noble. That is another meaning of Jena -- noble, aristocratic. Only then is one part of a totally different world.


To me, only Buddhas are real aristocrats, the awakened people of the earth; they are the salt. Because of them life is meaningful, significant. It has some poetry and some dance in it.


(Osho indicates that the seemingly contradictory meanings of the next sannyasin's name are actually intrinsically related, for victory comes not through fighting but through letting go.)


One cannot be ambitious for victory. The ambitious person will live in misery and will die in misery. He may achieve many things but those things -- money, power, prestige -- will be of the world, and they don't fulfil you, they don't give contentment, they don't make you peaceful or blissful. Even Alexander the Great dies a beggar. He realised it but only at the very last moment.


He was told by Dionysius that he was wasting his life by conquering the world, he would die a beggar. In India he visited many mystics and everywhere he was told not to waste his life in conquering the world because death would come and everything would be taken away, so it is just making a house of playing cards, a little breeze and the whole house collapses. He heard and yet he did not hear. At the last moment there was great pain in his heart because it was not that he was not warned -- he was warned many times -- but his ego wouldn't allow him to understand.


Sannyas means putting your ego aside so you can understand. And sannyas is basically surrender, surrender to the whole.


The master is just an excuse..You surrender to the master because you are not capable of communicating directly with such a vast universe. You need some small window through which to look at the sky. The open sky is frightening, scary, but once you have looked through the window, the indication of the stars will take you into an eternal journey.


The master is only a window, a window to god. That's why in the East we have worshipped the master as a god, for the simple reason that he opens a small door through which you can enter into the whole. You learn the art of surrendering in the company of the master then finally you have to do it with the whole.


It is just like when you go to learn swimmings you first learn in the shallow water, very close to the bank. You cannot go into the deep water directly. But once you have learned swimming then you start adventuring towards the depths more and more. And then one day one knows how to swim; then it does not matter whether the water is one mile deep or five miles deep. It doesn't matter, it is the same for the swimmer, it makes no difference at all.


The master is just the bank, the shore where without any fear you can learn the basic art of surrender -- and then the journey begins. The master is only the first step in the journey, a triggering point. But once one knows how to surrender one starts becoming victorious because by surrendering you become one with god -- and that's victory. Then there is no defeat possible. How can one be defeated if one has felt oneness with the whole?


(Another paradox seems to lie in the name Osho makes for the next sannyasin -- Shunyo Lothar.)


The flower of consciousness opens up only when all the garbage that one has accumulated over many many lives is thrown out, otherwise there is no space for the one-thousand petalled lotus to open. It needs a space and we are so full of junk, useless junk, full of memories which are of no use any more. We go on piling up files and files of memories, not only of this life, of many many lives. They are all there, now absolutely useless, but the functioning of our mind is like the functioning of any bureaucracy.


I have heard that in the White House the president was very worried because so many files had accumulated. He told his secretary to destroy all those files which were useless and to only keep those which had any use. The secretary immediately started working. He ordered many many people to first make copies of the files in case something was needed sometime, and then to destroy the files. This is how bureaucracy works. Now, this is unnecessary work: you are destroying the file but keeping a copy -- then what is wrong with keeping the file?


We go on accumulating useless, irrelevant memories, imagination, desires -- desires that we know are unfulfilable, still we carry on, still we again start fantasising. We have fantasised many times and we know it is pointless. Sometimes even in the middle of the fantasy you realise what you are doing.


Taking your bath you start thinking that you have become the president of the country and that if you become the president you are going to do this and that.... And then suddenly the cold water reminds you what you are doing -- you are not the president of the country and you are unnecessarily getting worried. But it will come again.


There are so many desires and so many thoughts and there is no space left; hence in the East our emphasis has been on how to empty the whole inside of our being. And there is no need to keep any copies because the more spacious we are, the more conscious we become, and that consciousness is enough to respond to any situation. You need not have notes, that consciousness is enough to tackle any challenge. What is the point of carrying an unnecessary load?


As one empties oneself one becomes aware of two things: the less the burden, the more efficient one is; the less the burden, the more responsible, the more capable of response, one is. Now one is not carrying readymade answers, and because one is not carrying readymade answers one can be more in tune with reality, one can see reality as it is and can respond accordingly. Otherwise the mind always reacts, it never responds. It uses the old readymade answer, it may not fit at all; and then you fail, then you fall short.


A man of absolute emptiness always has the right response. He never fails, he never repents, he never feels guilty, he never looks back. Each act is finished so totally that there is no question of thinking about it again and again. He simply moves ahead, unburdened of the past.


That is the meaning of Shunyo emptying oneself totally. And then glory, ultimate glory, is yours. In that emptiness you have enough space for your consciousness to unfold. Symbolically we have called it a one-thousand petalled lotus. It is such a huge phenomenon that it needs the whole sky. Our inner being is as vast as the sky if we just get rid of the junk.


So I don't want my sannyasins to renounce anything except the junk, except the rubbish, the dust that one gathers on the way.


(Osho's vision is of love as being less a revolution and more a process of evolution. He explains why.)


Revolution is drastic, sudden, like an earthquake. Love is evolution, very silent like a whisper. It works slowly, it works silently, but it transforms you totally; in fact because it is very silent it goes very deep.


An earthquake is more destructive than creative, hence the so-called revolutions have destroyed much; they have not been really creative. Love is far more creative. In revolution destruction becomes the goal, in love creation is the goal. If something needs to be destroyed it is destroyed only in order to create. In revolution destruction becomes the goal and if something is needed for destruction then it is created, otherwise there is no question of creating. A revolution is a little bit upside-down, evolution is a natural course.


A sannyasin has to change very silently without making any noise, without making any fuss -- and that happens through love. The very soul of sannyas is love.


Love as deeply as possible, let your love be as multi-dimensional as possible. Love as many things as you can; love music, love poetry, love dancing, love people, trees, birds. Don't make any limitation to your love.


The more you love, the richer you are; and if you love in a multi-dimensional way then from each dimension something new comes to your being. Poetry will give something to you which dancing cannot give and dancing will give something to you which poetry cannot give. Music will give something totally different and sculpture something still different. When all these gifts come to your being they become one. Then whatsoever is given by dance and poetry and painting and people and animals and trees and clouds, all comes to you and becomes a tremendous orchestra. Your life becomes a sheer joy, a phenomenon of beauty. That orchestra has been called god. That ultimate music, that multi-faceted richness is the goal of sannyas.


(There is a way to judge whether what you are doing is truly meditation or not. If it remains confined to the mind it's not the real thing, Osho says.)


There are many false meditations prevalent in the world because they are cheap, easy, and they fit with your mind; on your part they don't require any effort to go beyond.


Real meditation is an uphill task; you are climbing a mountain. The untrue meditation is like rolling down from a peak. It is easy, gravitation does all the work, you don't do anything. When your car is coming down you can turn off the ignition; no gas is needed, the car will continue going downwards just by the pull of gravitation.


What Maharishi Mahesh Yogi teaches is only such a meditation, a false meditation. It is just a repetition of a mantra -- and when anything is being repeated it simply means that the mind is being used. And by using the mind you cannot go beyond the mind, by using the mind the mind becomes strengthened. In fact the word 'mind' and mantra come from the same Sanskrit root; they are not two separate words. From mantra comes the Sanskrit word for mind, 'man', and from 'man', -- from 'man' comes the English word mind -- from the same root. It means thinking.


You can repeat a certain mantra continuously -- it will hypnotise you, it is auto-hypnosis. You will fall into a peaceful sleep, that's true, and if you are searching fora peaceful sleep a mantra can be used. I am not against it. It is a good non-medicinal tranquilliser but it is not meditation and not at all transcendental meditation, because transcendence simply means transcending the mind, and that can be done only by one thing and that is witnessing the mind; not by doing anything, not by repeating a mantra, chanting or anything. Any doing will be part of the mind.


There is only one secret which is not part of the mind, and that is witnessing, watching. Thoughts are passing, desires are moving, memories are coming and going like clouds in the sky and you are sitting silently simply watching, not doing anything. If you do anything immediately the mind starts functioning. What you do does not matter -- doing is part of mind. A non-doing witnessing, just witnessing, as if a mirror goes on witnessing whatsoever passes by -- that is awareness. And that awareness takes you beyond the mind. It is true meditation.

(Know truth and you know you are immortal, Osho promises Sambodhi Amrita.)


Only the untruth dies. The untruth has to die, it is bound to be momentary. It is born, for a moment it is there and then it is gone -- it is a soap bubble. But truth is eternal. To know it is to know that we have been here eternally and we are going to be here eternally. The moment this realisation settles in one, all fears disappear -- because all fears are rooted in the fear of death.


The moment one realises this there is no anxiety, no anguish left and the whole energy that was involved in anxiety, fear, anguish, agony, misery, is released. And that released energy becomes a rejoicing, it becomes a dance in your being. Without any deliberation on your part you start a new kind of life, a life which can only be described as celebration.
			

> [!info]
> Copyright 1964-1990 Osho (Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh)
>