---
section: Library
booktitle: "I Am Not As Thunk As You Drink I Am"
booktype: "Diaries"
bookcode: "THUNK"
dategiven: "08 October 1980 pm"
place: " in Chuang Tzu Auditorium"
chapternum: "Chapter #8"
chaptertitle: "None"
acode: "8010085"
shorttitle: "THUNK08"
audio: "No"
video: "No"
esttime: ""
displaytitle: "I Am Not As Thunk As You Drink I Am: Chapter #8"
---

```style
.sutra {
  font-style: italic;
  white-space: pre-wrap !important;
}
```
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> [!info]
> Note
>
[NOTE: This is an unedited tape transcript of an unpublished darshan diary, which has been scanned and cleaned up. It is for reference purposes only.]

(Anand Shari. Anand means bliss and Shari means princess.)


Bliss immediately transforms beggars into emperors because bliss opens the doors of the inner treasures, the doors of the real kingdom.


One can be rich on the outside -- that does not necessarily mean that he is rich inside. In fact the very effort to be rich on the outside simply shows an inferiority complex; deep down; he suffers from inner poverty and is somehow trying to cover it up. But the project is doomed; nobody has ever been able to be inwardly rich through outward richness. Just the opposite happens: the more rich you become on the outside, the more you become aware of your inner poverty, because of the contrast. The outside becomes a contrast and your poverty comes to your vision more clearly, more loudly.


Hence the paradox: the richest person is the poorest in the world. Even poor people are not so poor because they don't have any contrast to compare. That's why poor people will look a little more contented. They have nothing to be contented about but they appear to be contented; the rich people seem to be very discontented for the simple reason that now they know that the outward richness has taken up their whole life and the inner poverty has not even been touched by it; their life has been a wastage. Hence the great despair that grips rich societies, that is gripping the whole West now.


Science has given people richness -- technology, industry, thousands of gadgets -- and suddenly it has made them aware of an inner emptiness, meaninglessness. But taken rightly it can be a good beginning. It can be a blessing in the form of a curse because then one can start moving inwards.


When the outer project has completely failed, entirely failed, when all hope is shattered, then there are two alternatives: either one remains in despair, becomes suicidal, goes mad or one turns in. And that is the beginning of sannyas, the point of turning in.


Shari is also a beautiful symbolic name. In the Song of Solomon the rose of Sharon appears as a symbol of the beloved. And the song of Solomon is one of the greatest songs that has ever been composed, ever been uttered. But it is one of the most misunderstood songs too. Christians particularly are embarrassed by it. It is part of the Old Testament and they are incapable of comprehending its meaning. They are afraid, very much afraid, because it talks about beauty, love, joy, and their idea of religion is that of sadness. The cross seems to be perfectly fitting to them, but a rose of Sharon, a beloved and a song of love seems to be too materialistic, too worldly. So no Christian commentary exists on the Song of Solomon. Jews are a little more earthly people but even they feel embarrassed because the symbols that are being used are of love.


My own experience is that love is the only word that can describe something of the divine. The meeting of two lovers is the only experience that can say something about the indescribable, of the indefinable, that can at least indicate, give a hint of the tremendous ecstasy that happens when an individual merges with the whole. It is like two lovers merging into each other, it is a deep embrace of love. Of course it is far greater, far more profound, qualitatively different, on a different plane than that of ordinary lovers. But ordinary lovers come closer to it than anything else. No cross can come close to it.


For me the Song of Solomon is the most beautiful part of the Bible, of the old and the new Testaments, but it needs a totally new vision to explain it.


My sannyasins can live the Song of Solomon and their life will become a real commentary.

Bliss, industrious, is the meaning of Anand Jurgen.


It is not something to be added to us, it is not an achievement. We have brought it with us from the very beginning and it is not separable from us. It is our very soul.


But a problem has arisen for the whole humanity and now even to discover our innermost core, our very nature, industry is needed, great effort is needed, because the society has created so many barriers to reaching it. It has put so many rocks in the way and the source is completely covered with rocks. Those rocks have to be removed.


Bliss does not need any effort, but those rocks are there and they certainly need great effort, great industry, great perseverance, persistence. Once they are removed bliss is natural and spontaneous. But the society has done the wrong already and it has been doing it for so long that we have completely forgotten what wrong is being done to every child.


His blissfulness is being methodically destroyed. The parents destroy it, the priests destroy it -- everybody destroys blissfulness because there is a danger in it. A blissful person has a few qualities which are very dangerous to the establishment.


First, a blissful person becomes non-violent. You cannot force him to be a soldier. You cannot make him do any cruelty to anybody. In his blissfulness he has known that all is one. It is not a belief, it is his experience that the whole existence is one. He becomes non-destructive -- and society is violent, politics is violent, nations are violent, the state is violent, the church is violent, because they are all political games. Politics is political -- and that can be understood -- but even religion is political.


Every religion is trying to defeat other religions. There is a constant struggle going on, a cold war. And how long can you go on fighting a cold war? Sooner or later it becomes heated up, then a hot war erupts.


The society needs soldiers, violent people, murderous people; and a blissful person cannot be that. He would rather die himself than kill anybody. He willingly would be ready to die because he has tasted something of immortality so he does not care about death. But he will not destroy anything.


Even plucking a flower from a tree would be difficult for a blissful person. That is destructiveness -- you are killing the flower. A blissful person naturally becomes intelligent because when you become natural in one sense you become natural in all senses. It all happens simultaneously, it cannot happen in parts, in installments. It is not possible that you are naturally blissful but not intelligent.


If you are naturally blissful you will be naturally loving you will be naturally intelligent -- and the society does not want any intelligence in people because intelligent people are not easily enslaved. They create all kinds of resistances: they will fight to the very end but they would not like to be enslaved by anybody. And intelligent people cannot be Christians, Hindus and Mohammedans. They have enough intelligence and in that light they will live their life and they will search for god. They will not look up to the stupid priests to guide them. The intelligent people will not follow the mediocre politicians.


The politician cannot allow intelligence, the priest cannot allow intelligence. Even parents don't like an intelligent child because he asks embarrassing questions and he is not always reliable; sometimes he may say no. He will follow his intelligence. You cannot reduce him to a yea-sayer. Yes, when his intelligence feels it is right he will say yes. He is not saying yes to you, he is saying yes to his intelligence. So whenever something does not fit with his intelligence he will say no. And no parents want disobedient children.


These are the problems. That's why they have decided -- unconsciously, of course -- to destroy all possibilities of intelligence. And the only way is to put many rocks around the source so it becomes covered; even your own eyes cannot see it. And they teach you to look for it on the outside, to search in money, in power, in prestige. And once you start searching for bliss in the outside world you are finished. Life is too short and the world is too vast. By the time you realize that you are doing something impossible and bliss has to be found within, life has gone down the drain, nothing is left.


Alexander died crying, with tears in his eyes, realizing that he had been a fool. In conquering the whole world he completely forgot that the real victory is to conquer oneself -- but then it was too late.


It is good that young people are coming to me. I am interested in young people, because they have more time, something can be done. They have energy and they are ready to rebel and they are ready to throw away all the rocks. It only needs your readiness and those rocks can be dislodged from their places -- because they are not natural to you, they are just unnatural.


Bliss is something spontaneous but your spontaneity has been crippled. It is a very strange society in which we have lived for centuries: first it cripples you, then it gives you crutches. and then it sells crutches to you: go to the church, go to the temple, pray to god and read the Bible or the Koran or the Gita, listen to the priest. First it cripples you and then it starts supplying you with crutches.


My effort is totally different: I want you to throw away all crutches and regain your wholeness. You are not a cripple. It is only a belief that has been implanted in you, it is a kind of hypnosis. So I am going to be opposed by the religious people, by the politicians, by all the vested interests. And it is understandable; I don't feel that it could be otherwise. And my sannyasins have to remember that they are moving into a very revolutionary world of inner search.

(Then Osho talks of prayer.)


There are two kinds of prayer in the world. One, which needs no meditation as a prerequisite, and the other which needs meditation as a preparation, as a necessary preparation for prayer. Meditation is a means and prayer is the end. Meditation is the seed and prayer is the flowering of it. The first kind of prayer, which needs no meditation as a prerequisite, is false because it will be without any grounding. It will not have any roots.


Christian prayer, Hindu prayer, Mohammedan prayer -- these are prayers that you can learn like a parrot. You can repeat them and you can go on repeating them for the whole of your life. It becomes a ritual. If you don't repeat them you feel a little uneasy because it has become a habit; if you repeat them, that's all there is to it; nothing happens out of it.


It is just like smoking a cigarette, one can make it a habit; before a person goes to bed he smokes a cigarette. If he does not smoke he cannot go to sleep. That habit haunts him and forces him to repeat it -- habits are repetitive. And somebody says a little prayer before he goes to sleep. If he does not do it then he cannot fall asleep. It is the same, there is no difference; psychologically there is no difference -- for both it is a mechanical habit.


Smoking may be a little harmful physically and prayer may not be harmful physically, but prayer can be more harmful psychologically because you think you are being religiously just repeating a ritual. It is not so easy, it is not so cheap. And what are you doing? -- just repeating a few words to somebody in the sky. You don't know what kind of man this is and whether he understands your language or not -- because there are three thousand languages on the earth and there are at least fifty thousand planets populated with people. Just think of all the languages. If god understands all these languages he must have gone mad long ago -- you need not worry, forget all about praying. Either he must have gone mad or he must have become deaf, just to defend himself.


It is a monologue. Your god is only a projection. You believe in god so you have projected a god somewhere above, in the sky, and you are praying to your own imagination. It is really stupid! It is just like a small child holding his teddy bear... without his teddy bear he cannot sleep, he goes on carrying the teddy bear. It is dirty but he does not bother about that, he goes on carrying it. Without the teddy bear he feels very alone, afraid. With the teddy bear things are okay, he feels adjusted.


All these ideas about god that people go on carrying are nothing but teddy bears a little refined.


To me prayer needs meditation as a basic requirement. Meditation means the art of becoming silent, the art of becoming thoughtless, the art of becoming a no-mind. When all thinking disappears, all words disappear and there is only silence, undisturbed by any desire, by any memory, by any dream, when the lake of your consciousness is completely without any waves, not even small ripples on it -- that is meditation. Out of this meditation a great experience of joy arises in you because you discover your authentic reality, your original face.


Out of this discovery of inner bliss, beauty, grace, immortality, eternity, deathlessness, one feels thankful to existence, not to any person. One feels grateful to the whole existence because the whole existence has contributed in making you, in creating you. The earth has given something, the sky has given something, the birds have given something, the trees have given something. The air, the sun, the moon, the stars -- they have all contributed. Seeing this, knowing this, you feel grateful and a deep unspoken thankyou arises in you. Remember -- unspoken; you don't say it because there is nobody to say it to. Just a thankfulness pervades you, permeates you. Your whole being feels a tremendous gratitude. That is prayer, true prayer.

(Due to a technical problem the next sannyasin's initiation is no recorded.)

Prem Nirmala: love purity.


The mind is very much polluted. Only the mind can be polluted through education, conditioning, propaganda, but the heart fortunately remains beyond the propagandists, the pedagogues, the priests, the politicians; they cannot contaminate it, they cannot reach it. But they have played a trick, they have made everybody ignore the heart. They are afraid that if you live through the heart then you will live an individual life, the life of freedom. And the heart cannot be conditioned, they can condition only the head, so they have played a trick on everybody: they force your energy to go directly to the head, ignoring the heart, leaving the heart aside.


And my effort here is to rechannelise your energy: it should move through the heart, then it can go to the head, then there is no trouble. Love should be the first thing, logic should be secondary to it, then logic cannot harm.


But if logic becomes the foremost, it will destroy you; it will destroy all your loving qualities, because it is too calculative to be loving, it poisons. And if a man becomes incapable of love he becomes incapable of prayer, incapable of meditation, incapable of finding himself or god.


So the first thing is, the first step is to revive your heart; hence my emphasis on dancing, singing creativity, painting. So something that needs your heart and put the mind aside as much as possible.


To be here with me simply means to commune with me through the heart. It should not become an intellectual relationship, it should be a love relationship. The relationship between the master and the disciple cannot be intellectual. First it has to be a loving relationship, heart to heart -- and then finally it has to be an existential relationship, even deeper than the heart. These are the three centres.


First, the most superficial, is the head; the second, is the heart, which is just in between the three centres; and the third is your being. A sannyasin has to start with the second and reach the third, Those who remain in the first cannot be disciples, they can at the most be students. But I am not interested in students at all because I am not here to impart knowledge to you, I am here to trigger a process of inner transformation in you.

(Osho explains the difference between knowledge and wisdom.)


Knowledge is very ordinary, mundane. It is information about the outside world, about the objective world. It is about things. Wisdom is the experience of your own being. It is self-knowledge, and for it to happen you have to learn a certain method to transcend the body because the body belongs to the outside. That's why it depends on food, water, air.


Secondly, you have to transcend the mind because mind is also an agent of the outside world. It accumulates information given by others. It is not at your service, it is serving some other purpose -- the vested interest, the establishment, the church, the state. It is not in your service. It is a very illusory thing. People think the mind is serving them, it is not serving you. Its whole function is to serve the establishment in a very indirect way; hence every religion is interested in bringing new children into the fold as quickly as possible. Baptise them, make them Christians, Jews, Hindus, Mohammedans, and be quick so that the children are completely unaware of what is happening to them. And these people create the mind.


Of course in Soviet Russia the child is conditioned as a communist, as an atheist. That's what he thinks he is and for the whole of his life he will thing that he is an atheist -- he is not. He has been forced by the state to be an atheist. The same is true about everybody else: somebody is forced by others to be a Catholic, somebody else to be a Protestant, and so on and so forth. The mind is not yours -- that is the first thing to understand -- and it has to be transcended.


When the body and mind both are transcended, when you know that the body is not you and the mind is also not you, only then for the first time do you start moving into the real world of your inner being, your subjectivity, your interiority. And that's what Jesus calls the kingdom of god.


It is so full of light, so full of bliss that there is no fear possible, no anxiety, no worry, no anguish. It is constant ecstasy. And because it gives you a glimpse of the eternal even death disappears. Death happens only to the bodymind structure, not to you.


Meditation is the method which helps transcendence and meditation simply means awareness. Be aware of the body and you will see that you are not it, be aware of the mind you will see that you are not it either. And when both these are transcended, suddenly your own being explodes. Then there is the realisation of who you are.


(Bliss and freedom happen simultaneously; attain one and you immediately get the other into the bargain, Osho tells Anand Vimukta.)


All the methods that have been used down the ages can be divided into two: the methods that search for bliss and the methods that search for freedom.


For example, Socrates' search is for freedom, Gautam the Buddha's search is for freedom, Mahavira's search is for freedom -- to be free of everything so no boundary remains around you and you become unbounded, so that you can have the whole sky to yourself, the whole space to yourself. Or Krishna, Jesus, Kabir, Jalaluddin -- these are the masters who are in search of bliss, of being blissful, utterly blissful, cheerful, constantly rejoicing. Jesus says again and again to his disciples to rejoice.


But one thing that is very significant is that both have to use meditation. Whether you search for bliss or you search for freedom it is not possible without meditation. So whatsoever the goal is it is just an excuse; one has to start with meditation. And meditation is simply a state of awareness where no thoughts exist. The mirror is utterly empty, reflecting nothing because nothing is passing in front of it.


When thoughts are passing in front of your consciousness, your consciousness becomes overflooded with thoughts and you forget the mirror -- because you always find some thoughts, some feelings, some mood, some emotion, you can never see the mirror as just itself. It is always coloured by something else.


Meditation simply means to stop this whole traffic so that you can see your mirrorlike consciousness in its purity. And then both things happen together. Whatsoever you were searching for, freedom or bliss, they both come together. Both are flowers of the same bush.


I teach my sannyasins only one thing -- I don't give any outer discipline but only an inner process of meditation. So while you are here put your energy totally into meditation. There is nothing else to be done. Life can become such a bliss and such a freedom that you cannot even dream about it right now. What ecstasies are waiting for you, you cannot imagine; you can only know them. Even those who know cannot describe them; they are indescribable, no word is adequate enough to say anything about them.
			

> [!info]
> Copyright 1964-1990 Osho (Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh)
>